The Elite Forces of No

I’m a big Seth Godin fan…

I’ve been one for years…even before it was cool.

I haven’t run across too many of Godin’s pithy prognostications that I didn’t wholeheartedly believe in…

until today.

Seth posted…and I quote…

No is essential

If you believe that you must keep your promises, over-deliver and treat every commitment as though it’s an opportunity for a transformation, the only way you can do this is to turn down most opportunities.

No I can’t meet with you, no I can’t sell it to you at this price, no I can’t do this job justice, no I can’t come to your party, no I can’t help you. I’m sorry, but no, I can’t. Not if I want to do the very things that people value my work for.

No is the foundation that we can build our yes on.

from Seth’s blog
May 13, 2014

I’m also a fan of Mr. Jonathan Shields. His Good Life Project is often inspirational for me.

Jonathan apparently agreed with Seth as he tweeted out the above post this morning.

Well, that didn’t surprise me at all.

You see, I have been on the other end of a couple of Field’s noes (or is it no’s?)

I was looking for endorsements to an eBook I wrote and sent a copy over to JF.

No response…which I took as a NO.

Oh sure, he might’ve hated it…how would I know as I never received any response at all (again, Jonathan is very adept at taking Seth’s advice).

I also learned recently that Jonathan was in Costa Rica. So, being the Costa Rica Guy that I am, I offered my considerable expertise (hey, it’s the one thing I can legitimately claim expertise about).

While he did politely respond…

he declined the offer as he already had it all covered.

Now, I don’t blame or resent either of those no’s.

He’s a busy guy and I am a NO-body…

But I will use them to make this morning’s post point…

And that is, that Mr. Godin needn’t worry…

the elite forces of no are alive and well.

Why do I say “elite” forces?

It’s a bit uncommon for a yes to flow downward…

And that’s not a rare phenomenon in our world…

Consider that…

• banks tend to say yes only to those who don’t really need their money…
• employers tend to say yes to those in least need of a job…
• universities tend to say yes to those in least need of an education…
• venture capitalists tend to say yes to those in least need of capital…
• hot chicks tend to say yes to those in least need of a date…

I could go on.

We love to say yes to those most like us, or to those whom we most aspire.

Why is that?

Does that make the world a better place?

I don’t think so.

So, as much as I usually like to agree with Seth and Jonathan…

here’s one case where I get to say NO.

I was busy yesterday with something when I heard someone outside the house yelling for me. I sighed and went downstairs to see who was invading my space…

it was a young guy who comes by from time to time and washes my car…

I believe he has or has had a drug problem.

Anyway, he asked me for money to take the bus back to San Jose…said he had been living on the street and just wanted to go home to his mom…

My first reaction was to take Seth’s advice. After all, this kid is certainly NOT my responsibility.

But then I remembered what this blog is about…what I want my life to be about…

impact.

So I said yes. I had to actually leave my house and drive to a cash machine to deliver on it.

It was inconvenient.

It might have been fruitless.

But it felt like the right thing to do.

My point this morning is this…

Sorry Seth…

and Jonathan.

The culture of no that your propagating might be more convenient for you…

but it’s just not impact mindful.

image credit: Coastline Windows & Conservatories via Compfight cc